A duck walks into a bar. Then he walks out.

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

Im taking a shit right now.

Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

steven hawking walks into a bar

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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