What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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