A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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the WNBA.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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