chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

bangers and mash?

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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