What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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