What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

69

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man walks into a bar. the bartender ask what he wants to drink. the black man responds , "i will have one beer please". so the bartender gives it to him and says have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Brett Farve

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops