Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Knock Knock Whos there? The IRS *locking noise*

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What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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gay marriage.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

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why was the black guy crying because he was getting whiped because he wasent working in the felids

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-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

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if u r not my friend, like this joke

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A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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