Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

A dwarf walks under a bar.

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a serial rapist with a violent temper.

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? the wnba

Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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