Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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AROUND

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Goat balls.

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why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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