Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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95556

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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