One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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