Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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a black man pays his child support

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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