Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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