How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

Hi.

Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

What is funnier then 25 9/11

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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