Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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