What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

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Why was the boy stuck? He's under a tree.

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

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Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Robin, get in the car!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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