What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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