A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

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Top 10 Signs You Might Be Lonely and in Need of a Friend 10. Your closest friend has a skull tattooed on his knuckles and goes by the nickname bruiser. 9. You are becoming a little too fond of chess and pocket protectors. 8. You parents complain that your friends are a "Pack of wild chickens"-and it's not a figure of speech. 7. You follow your mailman around in hopes of a good conversation. 6. A cop pulls you over for speeding, and you add him to your Chistmas card list. 5. Your equation for a snappy party = TV remote + bean dip. 4. You forward e-mail jokes to yourself regularly. 3. You six best friends are Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Rachel. 2. You've named all of your roaches. 1. Phone solicitors hang up on you!

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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h

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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I? Everett

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why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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