Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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miha kako si?

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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