What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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I had a submarine.... once

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An anti-joke

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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