Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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the economy.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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