a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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