What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

an emo girl walked into a white room

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

America

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

What's bad about a Hispanic Women and a White man dating? A: Nothing at all really, unless either of them become involved in drugs, alchohol, or unprotected sex, which can ruin any relationship.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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