So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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