What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

69

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Oh, right

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops