Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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SHUT UP JP

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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