Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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I Have a Black Friend

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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