What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I'm homeless.

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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