What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops