A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

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LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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