Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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knock knock... ...no answer

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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