What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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your so fat. your fat!

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops