What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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Religion

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What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

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What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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That's unfortunate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why was the black man happy? He got a raise.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms.

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To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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YO mama so stupid, when she got hit by a bus she said WHO THREW THAF ROCK AT ME.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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