A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

thumb_up thumb_down -79

What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

thumb_up thumb_down +126

whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

I have read and agree to terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

I dislike old people.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A black guy walks in to a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +32

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops