Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

sir ya look like ron weasly hhahahahaha LEL

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

There's my tractor.

Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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