Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops