Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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