When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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my penis

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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NEVER

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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