Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Neither did she.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops