A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

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an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Women.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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