Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

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Knock knock. Its open.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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