A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

i'm hard

A fat guy!

why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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