An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a black man walks out of popeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops