Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

thumb_up thumb_down +6

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock, COME IN!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops