What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

i'm hard

justin bieber walks into a bar, he is then kicked out because he's under age.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

Dumbledore dies.

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

9/11 my birthday

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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