why did your mum die young because she had canser

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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How come Tommy isn't allowed to sing anymore? Because he has a punctured artery, collapsed lung, fractured ribcage, and a failed organ...

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops