A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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