How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Error 37.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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