There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +8

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you confuse a chicken? Paint yourself black and throw seeds at it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops