A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Get 100,000 Twitter Followers for $49.99 at Ladsta.com today!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A Jew walks into Macy's

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What happens when you step on Jupiter? You cannot.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

thumb_up thumb_down -26

y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops