What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

What did the Albino say to the other albino? Due to heredity and our inheritance of Chromosomes causing albinism, We could be displaced in society but luckily, we have eachother. They went home and lived happily. But not ever after. That craps or normal people. (freaking albinos...)

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

Whats cold and frozen? ice

What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

How you know when dislextic

what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

25

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...